Focus On the Family: SINGLES

Bible Study

(Note: Bible Study was  split betweeen women and men sessions for the singles classes. The notes below are from the women’s session*** Please contact Minister Kevin for men’s class information)


Focus on the Family:  Singles

In the previous bible study’s Bishop has been teaching us what it means to have motivation for participation. In covering  what it means to build God’s kingdom and live successful lives striving to  become more like Jesus Christ there were five attributes that  “Focus on the Family” builds on and that is: What is your capability, stability, ability, integrity and capacity to live successful  as singles, parents,  and or married couples?


Now most college students fit into the single category. So…are you single? The answer should be yes if you are not married because if you are not married you are actually single. Many if not everyone is struggling with singleness and have gotten into many situations due to a lack of capability, stability, ability, integrity and capacity in living Godly lives – a main stumbling block – not being able to live  successful single lives. Unsuccessful singleness can lead to heartbreaks, traumatic experiences,  misunderstandings-DRAMA, pre-marital sex which is outside of God’s will, unplanned pregnancy thus the possibility of  abortion or the un-preparation of parenting (if you are a single parent there is also a focus on the family class for all parents as well!), a higher percentage of contracting sexually transmitted diseases, the de-valuing of self-worth, low self-esteem, confusion of purpose in God and His perfect will for your life and more.


Many of us have experienced the blows of operating in unsuccessful singleness because we have filled God’s space with someone or something else that is outside His will and great plan for our lives.  There is no getting around it – singleness and relationships are a big part of life and we might as well learn God’s way NOW, instead of putting off the truth and His Word that sets us free and give us directions to live successfully single lives with the power of the Holy Spirit in us until God reveals to us that is our  individual times for marriage.  Who are we kidding? – We’re only fooling and deceiving ourselves when we live as unsuccessful singles! After all – God knows  and sees everything even when no one else does.


If you missed the college connect relationship forum in September in which ministers and elders came to Mizzou’s campus to shed Light on living successfully single or you wanted to attend another session that focused on singleness for more help and guidance– you now have the chance to come to Urban Empowerment to get the Word on living successfully single as well! We encourage everyone to come out and participate in this bible study teaching series on Wednesday at 7p.m. There are 2 Wednesday’s left – October 12th and October 17th, 2011.






Sister Larita Warren – Facilitator  “It’s all about me right now.”


  • Unsuccessful Singleness will cause you to inevitably have God redefine you back into who he created you to be.


  • What are some characteristics of a  successful single (list them out)

No kissing, No late nights, No inappropriate phone calls? What else …


Two Key Objectives in your walk and being single:

  • Plan on being single.
  • Plan on defining who you are.


1. “It’s all about me right now.”

2. Who am I?

  • Psalms 139: 13-16
    •  13 For you created my inmost being; 
you knit me together in my mother’s womb. 
14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;  your works are wonderful, 
   I know that full well. 
15 My frame was not hidden from you 
when I was made in the secret place,  when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. 
16 Your eyes saw my unformed body; 
all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.
    • If God knows who we are – who’s the only one left to discover who you are? – YOU
      • What did God create you to do?
      • What does your struggle say about you?
      • What has your relationships said about you?
      • Romans 5:3-5
        • 3 Not only so, but we[a] also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4 perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
          • Tribulation
          • Patience
            • Patience brings about experience.


  • Who God has for you is for you. – He isn’t with someone else.
  • Have you settled?
  • Why have you settled?
  • What can you show that you are?
    • What do you define yourself as?
    • How do you value yourself?
      • What do you see your worth as?
      • Isaiah 58:11
        • 11 The LORD will guide you always; 
   he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land 
   and will strengthen your frame. 
You will be like a well-watered garden, 
   like a spring whose waters never fail.
          • Singleness is like a form of fasting
            • You’re denying yourself from being in unproductive relationships until God sends you who he has for you.
            • If you are not married you are single.
            • Philippians 4:5-7
              • 5 Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. 6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
                • Be thankful that you are single.
                  • “God you get to let me know who you designed me to be.”
                  • What am on this earth for?
                  • Psalms 37:3
                    •  3 Trust in the LORD and do good; 
   dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
                      • Trusting God and going through the fire to become who you are.
                        • Don’t be out looking for nobody.
                          • Men seek their wives – why are you looking and trying to find a man?
                          • As a Christian Woman – what do you define yourself as? How does God define you?
                          • 1 Peter 1:13-16
                            •  13 Therefore, with minds that are alert and fully sober, set your hope on the grace to be brought to you when Jesus Christ is revealed at his coming. 14 As obedient children, do not conform to the evil desires you had when you lived in ignorance. 15 But just as he who called you is holy, so be holy in all you do; 16 for it is written: “Be holy, because I am holy.”[a]
                            • 1 Peter 13:18-19
                              • 18 For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, 19 but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.
        • 1 Peter 13:22
          •  22 Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart.[a]


Homework: What does the Word say your self-worth is?


Bible verses for next session:

  1. 1.     Beauty
    1. a.     1 Samuel 16: 6-7

6 When they arrived, Samuel saw Eliab and thought, “Surely the LORD’s anointed stands here before the LORD.”But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.”

      b. Proverbs 31:30

  1. 2.     Strength (Physique)
    1. a.     1 Timothy 4: 7-8
    2. b.     Psalms 147:10-11
    3. 3.     Clothes
      1. a.      Matthew 6:28
      2. b.     1 Peter 3: 3-5
      3. 4.     Intelligence
        1. a.     Jeremiah 9:23-24
        2. 5.     Material Possession 
          1. a.     Matthew 6:19-21
          2. 6.     Flaws and Weakness
            1. a.     2 Corinthians 12:7-10

Homework Questions (complete the statements)

1. Singleness is….

2. I hate being single when….


3. People think that singles are….

4. One good  thing about being single is….

5. Because I’m single I can’t…

6. I’d be ok with my singleness if ….

7. Most people should get married by the time they are…

8. Being singleness at my age was/ is not expected what it is to be because….




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